Not lalalalia but emotional intelligence

Lalalalia = n. the realization while talking to yourself that someone else is within earshot, which leads you to crossfade into mumbled singing, an auditory sleight of hand that distracts the audience from the exposed platform under your persona while you prepare to saw your confidence in half.

Definitia este despre:

Dar nu despre disonanta, discordanta, dizarmonie (sinonime) vreau sa scriu acum.  Ci despre a te simti bine si despre inteligenta emotionala, una din multiplele tipuri de inteligenta. Si mai ales, despre inteligenta emotionala descrisa de Daniel Goleman in THE NEW LEADERS (Transforming the art of leadership into the science of results), the author of EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE.

Ce spune el in carte? (desi e cam veche, publicata in 2002 are idei ok, valabile aplicabile nu doar liderilor, care pana la urma, daca ne gandim sunt tot persoane ca oricare altele, doar cu niste chestii in plus, chestii dobandite, invatate, dezvoltate, nu congenitale)

Domeniile  si competentele asociate inteligentei emotionale :

1. Constiinta de sine (self-awareness)

– constiinta de sine emotionala (cunoasterea si recunoasterea emotiilor)
accurrate (ce cuvant extraordinar!!!) self-assessment: cunoasterea propriilor forte si limite
– increderea in sine

2. Managementul persoanei

– self-control emotional: pastrarea emotiilor disruptive si a impulsurilor demoment, sub control
– transparenta: onestitate si integritate
– adaptabilitate: flexibilitate in adaptarea la situatii schimbatoare sau diverse obstacole care survin
– achievement: ambitia de a-ti dezvolta performantele
– initiativa: disponibilitatea de a actiona si de a sesiza oportunitatile
– optimism

3. Social awareness (aceste capacitati determina modul in care we manage relationships):

– empatie (sesizarea emotiilor celorlalti, intelegerea perspectivei lor si manifestarea interesului sincer in privinta lor)
– organizational awarness
– service: recunoasterea si intalnirea cientilor, a nevoilor lor

4. Relationship management

– inspirational leadership
– influence
– developing others
– change catalyst: initiating, managing, and leading in a new direction

Oamenii cu self-awareness sunt realisti – nici foarte auto-critici nici foarte naivi.

Self Awareness = a propensity for self-reflection and thoughtfulness.
Nicio motivatie externa nu le poate da oamenilor un imbold putenic pentru a da ce-i mai bun din ei.

Self-managementul = componenta inteligentei emotionale care ne elibereaza de a fi captivul propriilor noastre emotii. Persoanele cu cel mai bun self-management emotional castiga. (nu stiu voi, am de lucrat aici, oho!). Cel mai mare act de responsabilitate al liderilor e de a-si controla starea de spirit.

Empatia e un antidot care ii pune pe oameni in acord (traducere socaciana din #traducerisocaciene de pe twitter) in subtilitati din body language sau care iti permite sa auzi mesajul emotional din spatele cuvintelor (cuvintele care sunt nu cele care nu sunt)

The leader  cum ar zice Aristotel: “to be angry with the right person, in the right way, at the right time, and for the right reason” (that’s a terrific and terryifing truth, but yet a truth). One leader might excel through self-confidence, flexibility, and a knack for developing the talents of others (naspa)
„Emotional intelligence involves circuitry that runs between the brain’s executive centers in the prefrontal lobes and the brain’s executive centers in the prefronal lobes and the brain’s limbic system, which governs feelings, impulses, and drives. Skills based in the limbic areas, research shows, are best learned through motivation, extended practice, and feedback. Compare that kind of learning with what goes on in the neocortex, which governs analytical and technical ability. The neocortex grasps concepts quickly, placing them within an expanding network of associations and comprehension. This part of the brain can figure out from reading a book how to use a computer program, or the basics of making a sales call. When learning technical or analytic skills, the neocortex operates with magnificent efficiency.
The problem is that most training programs for enhancing emotional intelligence abilities, such as leadership, target the neocortex rather than the limbic brain.  Under a microscope, the limbic areas – the emotional brain – have a more primitive organization of brain cells than do those in neocortex, the thinking brain.
The thining brain can comprehend something after a single hearing or reading.
The limbic brain is much slower learner – particularly when the challenge is to relearn deeply ingrained habits. Reeducating the emotional brain for leadership learning, therefore, requires a different model from what works for the thinking brain: it needs lots of practice and repetition”.
Concluzia:
3 things for improvement:
– bring bad habits into awareness
– counsciously practice a better way
– rehease that new behaviour ar every opportunity until it becomes automatic
Va las cu/la 2 imagini: 1 si 2 si sa-mi spuneti ce ati ales🙂

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